cheating

Episode #135: WTF Should We Need & Expect Of Our Partners | A Conversation with Gabrielle Stone

You loved her the last time she was here and she’s BACK!

Gabrielle Stone (she/her), a fan favorite on the Live Your F*ck Yes Life podcast, makes no secret about her past with toxic relationships & a cheating MF of an ex husband. And she’s shared it all in her best selling books and on her podcast and beyond. I’ve been having a lot of conversations in my DMs and with friends about the expectations and needs we place on our partners and, given that I am polyamorous and inherently bring that bias and lens to any conversation around relationships, I wanted to bring on someone who consciously chooses monogamy to have this conversation with and knew that Gabrielle was the gal to call upon.

Things we talk about on this episode:

  • conversations we’ve had with our friends around the important things in relationships

  • our shared need to be seen, loved and championed for who we are

  • how societal norms have informed our paths in relationship dynamics & choices

  • the importance of communication

  • the BS narrative that healing can only happen when we’re single

  • the lessons we can take from the relationships we’ve had and have

  • the idea “soulmate” or “the one”

  • Amanda’s constellation way of viewing her relationships

  • the needs & expectations we have in our romantic partnerships

LINKS MENTIONED IN TODAYS EPISODE:

Live Your F*ck Yes Life Summit: Non Monogamy & Polyamory

Gabrielle’s Instagram

The Ridiculous Misadventures of A Single Girl

Episode 134: I’m Addicted To You Don’t You Know That You’re Toxic Monogamy Culture

Episode 125: Eat, Pray, #FML with Gabrielle Stone

FML Talk: F%ck Polyamory

WORK & CONNECT WITH AMANDA:

Peer Support Sessions

Amanda’s Instagram | Website

Amanda’s book, I Chopped Off My Tits

Become a Patreon of the podcast

Join her email list for all the important things / monthly announcements

Episode #119: Let's Talk Polyamory | A Conversation Around Perception With My Husband

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In todays episode of our “Let’s Talk Polyamory” series of the podcast, we deep dive into all things perception. I get asked about this all of the time and I get it — I was wildly concerned about how I would be perceived / the reactions my friends and family would have before coming out as polyamorous. Not to mention how it would impact my online presence and beyond.

So we deep dive into all of that.

Tune in to todays episode to hear all about:

  • how we both felt about how we would be perceived before we came out as poly

  • the reactions of our friends and family

  • the mis-perceptions around ethical non monogamy & polyamory

  • how our own perceptions and biases around the things we are pulled towards can produce massive feelings of fear and shame

  • the root of why fear of perception has impacted us individually and beyond

Episode #105: All Things Polyamory Q&A | A Conversation With My Husband

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Is monogamy the only way to build a conscious, loving and lifelong relationship?

I used to believe it was the only way. But as you know, as I shared in episode 101, after 8 years together, we moved away from the monogamous framework and stepped into the ethical non monogamous space two years ago.

I know that people have MANY strong feelings around this (and it makes sense! Monogamy is what our society is built around and I definitely had my fair share of concerns and shame spiral around even the thought of considering it for years before we moved in that direction), and I’ve been getting LOADS of questions in my Instagram DMs so I decided to bring on a super special guest — my incredibly goofy and wonderful husband — to dig into what our unique journey into polyamory has looked like.

We are certainly not experts when it comes to polyamory, ethical non monogamy or relationships — you can listen to a bunch of previous podcast episodes around relationships, sex and beyond from the experts — but I do think that almost 10 years of going through the shit with a human entitles us to have some shit to say that’s worth sharing. And hell, we are certainly experts on OUR unique individual experiences in the world of ethical non monogamy and polyamory.

And today on the podcast, we deep dive into some pretty dense topics around relationship longevity, health and beyond and I am THE MOST excited to share this conversation with you all.

Things we discuss on todays episode:

  • My husband’s unique perspective around why polyamory and ENM feels aligned for him

  • How we opened the door to transition from YEARS of monogamy and how we ended up identifying as polyamorous

  • The difference between affairs/cheating and non monogamy

  • The multiple umbrellas of non monogamy: swinging, polyamory etc.

  • Attraction and relationship preferences are a spectrum as much as sexuality & gender is

  • A deep dive into some of the ups and downs of this journey, both as individuals and as a couple

  • ENM terms like unicorn hunting, triad vs. throuple, nesting/anchor partner, non hierarchical vs. hierarchical polyamory

  • Navigating jealousy and insecurities we’ve both experienced in our journey

  • Boundaries, communication and agreements & the path to figure that shit out being MESSY AF

  • All things fantasy/kink, how polyamory isn’t really so different than monogamy, ridiculous banter between the two of us and so much more.

Episode #35: Polyamory and ethical non monogamy with Dedeker Winston

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EPISODE SNEAK PEEK

Our narratives around love and sex and romance don’t necessarily hold up all of the time.

Dedeker Winston was raised to be a wholesome Christian conservative, but later opted to be a sex-positive polyamory activist, relationship coach, and nude model. She currently provides one-on-one coaching services for people transitioning into non-monogamy and is one of the hosts of the Multiamory podcast. She has been sought out as an expert for Cosmopolitan, Glamour, Newsweek, Vice, Bustle, AskMen, and recently presented a Talk at Google on non-monogamy. She is the author of The Smart Girl's Guide to Polyamory.

Here are a few things we discuss in todays episode:

  • Polyamory 101: what does it even mean to be polyamorous?

  • Dedeker’s journey from conservative Christian to sex positive and ethical non monogamy activist

  • Removing the stigma from ethical non monogamy

  • Infidelity, affairs and being attracted to someone else when you’re already in a relationship

  • Cultural norms and the expectations placed on us without being aware of it

  • The relationship escalator and how more of us are on it without even realizing it

  • Jealousy

  • The multiple ways you can dive into the world of ethical non monogamy

LINKS MENTIONED IN TODAY’S EPISODE

TEAMI BLENDS TEAS — use code LYFYL for 15% off your purchase

Websites: dedekerwinston.com | multiamory.com
Twitter: @dedekerwinston
Snag her book The Smart Girls Guide to Polyamory // Audiobook version coming out on October 18th!

Stepping off The Relationship Escalator

Relationship anarchist manifesto

Cappadocia

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photos by Kyle Wilson , Zeke D and Cam Frontain